The Imperfectionist: You Have to Do the Living Yourself
Oliver Burkeman
People often look for rules or tricks to avoid fully showing up in life. The author argues that real change comes from repeatedly choosing, in each moment, to do what matters. Practice resisting easy shortcuts and simply start the small tasks that matter today.
1 Nov 2025
I’ve come to think of as a deeply important point: building a meaningful life is much less about discovering the right set of practices or habits than it is about cultivating the willingness to step up moment after moment and just do more of the things that matter, for the projects and people and causes you care about most.
But in fact I think it’s much more straightforward and doable than the quest for the perfect set of techniques, the perfect environment, or the perfect system. That quest is endless, and will torment you forever. Whereas self-mastery – or presence of mind, or whatever you want to call it – can only ever happen now. You’re forgiven all the times you failed in the past, and needn’t worry about the times you might fail in future. You just need to give it a shot now, accepting that it’ll probably make you feel a bit queasy: to choose the healthy option, close the social media app, write another hundred words, really listen to the other person, and so on. As soon as you try, you’ve succeeded – and along comes a fresh moment in which to try again.