Surrender as a Non-Stupid Life Strategy

A large percentage of human suffering is anticipatory tension, or dreading a future experience such that you actualize its potential suffering in the now. Anticipatory tension is using the illusion of knowledge to generate the illusion of control. Much of what people call planning is this.

My best outfits are all selected by someone else. When I’m at a clothing store, and I meet an employee who seems engaged, I tell them to dress me for maximum attractiveness. They do a much better job than I do. Of course: I can’t see myself as well as someone else can. This is why I try to listen to what the world apparently wants to do with me,rather than who I imagine I am.

The unexamined life may not be worth living, but the fully examined life is a pinned butterfly in a glass case. I’ve concluded that my life is a grand artistic project, but I’m best off not knowing what it is.

It’s nice to enjoy what you’re doing. But there is a greater liberation available: accepting that the Work in front of you is your Work, and that has little to do with how you feel.

The older I get, the more that friendship is a discovered property. There are lots of wonderful people I meet who aren’t my friends. And then I meet someone and think: oh, that’s my friend, you’re coming with me. One of the best things you can do for yourself is to notice when you’re inexplicably bound to someone, and act on it without thinking.

We are drawn towards people because they are different. We are given the opportunity to love more when we find ourselves resenting them for the very difference that drew us to them. The opportunity is to release resentment and instead surrender to separateness. Ironically, this is how you feel less alone.